Tuesday, November 9, 2010

I don't like wondering if I have done something wrong, every time I talk to you. I obviously mention things any way.
It is okay, I understand.. that you need space (but I am not sure if you are taking it?) Its okay that you don't respond. I'm not mad about it. I am just trying to figure out what I should do, where I should stand.
And that is okay too.

I guess to just be true to myself, I should pause, step back, give you sometime and keep having fun-- then try again. This is what I would like to do.

I am trying not to panic at all. I would like to just say "hey... let's talk" and talk all about you, what you feel, the things you think-- about everything. Not just me. Though, I would be lying to say I don't want to know that too.

I am afraid I am going to be Marissa to you. Saying I love you, and you just staring back blankly. Thank you for not saying it if you don't mean it...

But I do love you. I want to make you smile, that is what a little photo is for. I want to share goofy times with you, as well as help you in your pain. I understand you need to stand on your own for now-- and that if you never want my help, I'll be okay. I know it isn't my fault and my decision. It still, hurts, though.

Please open your mind and your heart, when you are ready. Please at least be willing to talk to me and give me a second look. Both of us only deserve happiness and I know I can give that to you, especially now.

I hope you are having fun though!! Like, really. I know you can't be completely okay right now, but I am glad every time I see you smile.

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